Reflections on Proper Attitudes of Free People

Looking back through time at my Dad's reminder to make sure my attitude is everything it should be to align with the pursuit of meaningful goals.

Those who follow my work in the political world understand that I hold my late father in high regard.  Dad was a Vietnam veteran three times over who lived a tragically flawed life, but in moments, his true character came out as a shining light.  When I think about my Dad today, I don’t think about the negative moments when vice took over, or the hurtful words and lack of emotional support caused by trauma.  I think about the lessons I hold dear today as I approach 40.

Dad and I parted ways in May 2010, shortly before I deployed to Afghanistan.  Saying goodbye to my dying Dad, who was afflicted with pancreatic cancer, while he still had more than three months to live, remains the most excruciatingly painful moment of my life.  It has been more than 14 years since I pulled out of that driveway in Mississippi and made my way across the world to my own war.

While I was deployed, he wrote me letters that drive me forward today in my own mission for freedom. One of the most meaningful is one he had written for me for later, which I was given after he died in September.  He understood my thoughts were going to be all over the place with his impending death and my need to focus on my mission, which was to provide intelligence support to a primitive area of Afghanistan the size of Georgia.  In an excerpt from this letter, he focused on the need for attitude maintenance:

Your attitude is everything.  Additionally, your attitude is your altitude.  Those with a poor attitude suck energy from a group, those with a positive attitude inject energy into a group.

Maintaining a good attitude is hard yet rewarding.  You feel good about yourself when you look in the mirror to shave, you reward those who love you by removing fear and uncertainty from their lives.  Because a good attitude reinforces the belief in those who love you that you are in fact everything they think you to be and in fact possess all those qualities they have and still attribute to you.  It is a gift to those you love and removes uncertainty from their lives.

A poor attitude is quickly noted by others.  Superiors weigh you by it, peers judge you by it, subordinates respond to it for they are particularly afraid and need guidance that is positive.  The enemy takes advantage of it if able.

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“Your attitude is your altitude” is not my Dad’s original quote, but it is one of the most universal of all truths.  No one looking to change the world or carry out a meaningful mission and life purpose can do so with a negative, pessimistic outlook on life.  I’ve mentioned that I grew up a huge fan of 1980s and 1990s era professional wrestling, and one of my favorites, a man who went by the ring name of Ultimate Warrior, once said:

If your first thought out of bed in the morning is “I can’t,” then rest assured, you won’t.

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Four for the Free

1)        Pessimism must stop in the planning phase.  Taking account of an enemy’s strengths is part of diligent planning and required to formulate a countering course of action.  Beyond that, negativity and pessimism are tremendous liabilities for any individual or team.

2)        Optimism enhances your chance of success and brings others to join your cause, whereas pessimism and negativity sideline those who fear being part of a losing effort.

3)        A good attitude reminds every component of your body that they can be part of achieving incredible things.  The most successful athletes and warriors visualize success, write down their goals, and frequently achieve them.

4)        All leadership hinges on convincing subordinates that they are capable of meaningful accomplishment, personal growth, and continuous advancement. The best way to prevent all of these things is to project “can’t” instead of “can.”

The choice to overhaul attitude lies with the man or woman in the mirror, and can start right now.