The Authentic Season

Reflections from a lifelong Grinch about seeing through the illusions and into the humble origins of this special holiday

I am currently having one of the best Christmas seasons I’ve had in years - probably the best I’ve ever had as an adult. Before you go on reading this article and worry that I’m miserable - that isn’t the truth. I’m sharing meaningful time with my children and with Rachel, and am substantially better off than I was four years ago as I underwent major life change and dealt with significant depression.

Last year, I posted about my 2024 Christmas experience in “Rediscovering Christmas.” It was my first Christmas remarried, and not only that, married to someone who loves Christmas with a childlike fervor. I kid you not - the Christmas decorations go up before Thanksgiving in Rachel Keshel’s house.

In that article, I referenced how my father’s vibes around Christmas season became my own:

My dad struggled with Christmas, and he always explained to me that many of the songs played over and over, especially Silent Night, reminded him of vigils to the fallen soldiers who never came home from Vietnam. He couldn’t keep it together when that song was sung in church at the annual caroling service. I’ve come to believe my own holiday blues came from missing out on the 2010 Christmas season thanks to my year-long tour in Afghanistan. That one-year gap, in which I worked round-the-clock day in and day out as if they were normal weeks, was enough to throw me out of the holiday cheer indefinitely.

I have countered the blues with feelings of gratitude toward having peaceful time with my family and reflecting on the greatness of Christ. I married a great woman who appreciates me and wants to enjoy life with me, not in competition with me, and who has fought for me to have the best possible relationship with my kids. As I write, my nine-year old daughter, Willow, is wrapping gifts in front of my desk for her siblings and step-siblings, and has been busy these past couple days baking cookies with Rachel, who she loves and is always sad to say goodbye to after visits.

There is nothing quite like it.

But what does the American Christmas show us about Christ? Perhaps this is the issue that gnaws at my core. I did not grow up a Christian. At the age of 17, I put my faith in Christ, and was the first in my family to make such a profession. Sure, we celebrated Christmas like the standard American “Christian” family, but I was not steeped in true Christmas tradition as so many who grew up in church were. Strangely, even though I was a stranger to the fold, I sniffed out the inauthentic nature of how so many view this special holiday.

Americans have plenty. We have so much, in fact, that we are blind to the realities of the world. Christians in Nigeria are being slaughtered for their faith in Christ; there is a true cost to their obedience and dedication that is realized daily and at a terrible price. Here in the United States, voters will hit the polls next fall to see if they can elect people who are promising to save them a hundred bucks on groceries or utilities per month. These differences in material wealth should not make those who are better off feel bad for having more, but should be cause for self-examination to make sure we don’t forget what happened over 2,000 years ago when God became man in the form of a helpless baby.

Clearly, the celebration of Christmas can’t be about how much loot we can pile up under the tree, right? If so, then Christmas would be unfair, since the impoverished around the world would have little reason to celebrate. Christmas also can’t be about an outward show, or who has the best lights display, because people living without electricity are also among those who celebrate the true reason for this season.

That reason is the coming of the Prince of Peace, whose humble nature was evident the moment he was born in a manger, and all the way to the end when he carried his own cross to the place he gave up his Spirit. I think I’ve reconciled that my frustrations with the modern Christmas have to do more with the fact that so much of what our culture has come to repeat on an annual basis is based on societal expectation, rather than the acknowledgement of Christ’s virtue, which we are supposed to emulate.

I have spent the vast majority of my life around people who claim to be after the Savior’s heart, yet when given the opportunity to display anything of his character, fail to do so. My words are the words of a highly imperfect person. I’ve messed up so many things in my life, hurt so many people I care about, that I can’t stand here and speak on my own virtue:

Two people owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he forgave the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?”

Simon replied, “I suppose the one who had the bigger debt forgiven.”

“You have judged correctly,” Jesus said.

Luke 7:41-43 (New International Version)

I think for many who, like me, have struggled with Christmas season, you are feeling the pull of your own Spirit calling you to remember the humility of Christ, who Himself was the gift that inspires this season of what is supposed to be about giving, self-sacrifice, and togetherness. When we see the opposites - the consumerism, the flashiness without substance - we sense the recoil within. If we fail to pass along these reflections to the most impressionable among us - the children - then we look past the miracle and sacrifice it for fleeting happiness.

Enjoy Christmas - the most compelling reasons I have to do so are because I’ve had the opportunity afforded me to experience Christmas Day alone, without anyone who wanted to spend time with me. Now I have many people around me who I see with the amazing reminder that nothing we have or hold dear is possible without the restoration the authentic Christmas provides.

Merry Christmas to you all, and I hope you can reconcile your Christmas blues by understanding that putting on the character of Christ points the true way to peace.

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Seth Keshel, MBA, is a former Army Captain of Military Intelligence and Afghanistan veteran. He is intent on living life as fully as possible, taking adventures, and finding new ways to appreciate the road less traveled in pursuit of Freedom.